Ms. Sunshine
H earns the H.L. Mencken Curmudgeon award from this blogger. Only she does it with a lot fewer words. Needless to say that I am a fan of Mencken, so we have another favorite of mine here at Deadwood. We have a little ritual here between the time of the first and second meal sittings, we ask H, as she eats at the first sitting and we the second, what was for dinner. Invariably she answers, "It was so bad that I forgot already."
Although it is not difficult to repeat this scenario with any number of other residents, H says it with a quiet disgust that transcends the ordinary. It is a humble form of poetry.
Ever sporting, Grandma will at any rate say, "lets go check the menu," which can be futile at times because what is written and what is served are often quite at odds. Weekends are especially dicey. H also has a not uncommon habit here of picking out all the meat and eating the rest. Makes you want to suggest a salad.
H's deadpan delivery of exactly what she thinks about you and/or your opinion is the stuff of legend. She has the nickname of 'Mean H,' as there are at least two others with the same name, and nobody gets confused about who you are referring to. But there is subtlety there, and a gleam in the eye if your own myopia isn't too advanced. I caught on right away and ever since we've been nudging each other in the ribs. She managed one day to get a group of about six residents involved in hiding my cell phone and cigs which I momentarily left behind.
H isn't one of the snappy dressers here, she "doesn't give a damn," but she's all personality, most of which is lost on the others. For all of her pooh-poohing, she is the first one to volunteer to hand out the snacks at the parties and gatherings and takes care of the common caged birds in the halls as well as policing the cigarette butts that some of the others let drop when they can't be bothered to roll over to an ashtray. She just does it with a look that kills.
